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• Stacked Deck An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates.
  St. Peter checks his dossier and says, "Ah, you're an engineer--you're in the wrong place....
• A property manager dies and soon finds himself standing in front of St.
  Peter. St. Peter tells him "You have a choice of going to heaven or to hell and I suggest you check them both out before deciding....
• Proof By Intimidation ----- -- ------------ A Horse has an infinite number of legs.
  A horse has two legs in back and forelegs in front....
• A Frenchman, an Englishman, a Texan, and a Mexican are flying in a plane.
  The pilot explains to her passengers that the plane is too heavy and in order to avoid an ugly crash, some weight needs to be removed from the plane....
• Federal Aviation Agency, Washington 25, D.C. Gentleme
  I was asked to make a written statement concerning certain events that occurred yesterday....
• This is a true story told by a friend of mine. It happened to a girl she knew.
  There was this girl driving along the highway, when she suddely had to visit the restroom....
• Federal Aviation Administration, Washington, D.C. Gentleme
  I was asked to make a written statement concerning certain events that occurred yesterday....
• Once upon a time there was a sperm named Stanley who lived inside a famous movie actor.
  Stanley was a very healthy sperm. He'd do pushups and somersaults and limber himself up all the time, while the other sperm just lay around on their fat asses not doing a thing....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...