Signs It's The Holidays In New York City
10. People say, "Merry Christmas!" Before giving you the finger.
9. Instead of yellow tape, cops close off murder scenes with festive
holly.
8. People pray even when they're not in the back seat of a cab.
7. If you dial 911 you just hear a recording of Deck the Halls.
6. Slight increase in number of fat bearded guys who want you to sit
on their lap.
5. Gullible tourists purchase Rockefeller Center Christmas tree for
$100.
4. Vendors cut price of hot dogs left over from last Christmas.
3. Police investigate the season's first sleigh-jacking.
2. Strangers greet each other with "I got your Yule log right here."
1. Two words: Crack nog.
MERCURY COMMUNICATIONS GROUP, INC.
10. People say, "Merry Christmas!" Before giving you the finger.
9. Instead of yellow tape, cops close off murder scenes with festive
holly.
8. People pray even when they're not in the back seat of a cab.
7. If you dial 911 you just hear a recording of Deck the Halls.
6. Slight increase in number of fat bearded guys who want you to sit
on their lap.
5. Gullible tourists purchase Rockefeller Center Christmas tree for
$100.
4. Vendors cut price of hot dogs left over from last Christmas.
3. Police investigate the season's first sleigh-jacking.
2. Strangers greet each other with "I got your Yule log right here."
1. Two words: Crack nog.
MERCURY COMMUNICATIONS GROUP, INC.
Related:
- Least Popular Christmas Carols
10. Deck The Halls With Useless Junk / Martha Stewart Made While
She Was Drunk!
(Deck The Halls) 9. Rudolph The New York Mayor /... - What's the difference between a banjo and a(n)...
Chain Saw:
( 1.) a chain saw has a dynamic range. ( 2.) you can... - Signs That You Won't Be Winning An Academy Award
10.
Instead of "direct to video," your movie was released... - Christmas 2000
A new contract for Santa has finally been negotiated.
Please read the following carefully....... I regret... - Announcing the:
1988
REC.HUMOR.FUNNY
Computer Network Humour
Annual
I often get requests for back-jokes out of rec.humor.funny,
so I have gathered together over 600 of the better... - Signs You're at a Bad Office Christmas Party
10. Eggnog smells suspicously like Liquid Paper.
9. Anyone caught under mistletoe gets choked by Latrell... - W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<<<
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while... - Ten Ways I, David Letterman, Am Spending The Holidays
10.
Visiting Robert Downey Jr. with a carton of Christmas... - Why a Christmas Tree Is Better Than a Woman
1. A Christmas tree doesn't care how many other Christmas trees you have had
in the past.
2. Christmas trees don't get mad if you use exotic...
From the same category:
- Polly Want a Cracker?
There's this fellow with a parrot.
And this parrot swears like a sailor, I mean he's... - Unknown
Why do cowboys chew tobacco?
To sweeten their breath... - I'm reminded of a letter some poor professor wrote to Playboy about his
inability to get vanity plates with the initials of his college on them.
The man taught at the Tennessee Institute of... - Old TV Show Plots Updated for the 90's (Part II)
15> "Lassie" -
Timmy falls down the old well, bringing a CNN news... - quot;Shut up,
or I'll nail your OTHER foot to the floor!"...
