Hello, this is David. I don't live here, so if you were trying to call me, you've dialed the wrong number. On the other hand, if you were trying to call John, Jim, or Eric, please leave your name and number at the tone. I don't guarantee that one of them will call you back -- only that I won't.
Related:
- Jerk!
Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone
call I had to make.
I found the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely... - Hello, epicenter of the Universe, God speaking. If you leave your name,
number, and prayer after the tone, I will call you... - The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages
"Hi!
I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your... - Answering machines. Nowadays almost everyone has one,
complete with a snappymessage of their own device... - Voice Mail
My wife and I can't come to the phone right now,
but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get... - I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message,
name and number, I'll call you back when I am..... - When I was taking a 300 level computer science class in college
there was a girl in the class that was a good friend of mine,
she was one of those people that was accademiclly briliant... - One voice: I didn't expect an answering machine.
Another voice:
Nobody expects an answrering machine. Our... - ALIEN ZOMBIE & THE CONGO LIZARDS
You’re in luck.
As my luck would have it,
I made my bones in a musical family. Grandpop slapped...
From the same category:
- Hello, this is David. I don't live here, so if you were trying to call me,
you've dialed the wrong number. On the other hand,... - The President is not in his office at this time. Please leave your name,
phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade... - As the drugs take hold, you feel you are losing your grip on reality.
You begin to hallucinate. You see a telephone... The... - I can't come to the phone right now because I'm down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty dollar bills.
If you need any money, or if you just want to check... - I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember.
I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving...
