Bandleader: Welcome To T. G. I. McScratchy's Where It's Constantly New Year's Eve.

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Bandleader: Welcome to T. G. I. McScratchy's where it's constantly New
Year's Eve. Here we go again! Three, two, one!
Everyone: Happy new year!
["Auld Lang Syne" starts up]
[a waiter walks up with champagne glasses]
Marge: It must be wonderful to ring in the new year over and over
and over.
Waiter: Please, kill me.
-- At least he hasn't been hiccupping for 45 years,
"Itchy and Scratchy Land"