Related:

• Burns: Thanks for not making fun of my genitalia. Marge
  [sotto voce] I thought I did. -- On Marge's portrait of Mr. Burns, "Brush with Greatne...
• You heard me, I won't be in for the rest of the week.
  ... I told you! My baby beat me up! ... No, it is not the worst excuse I ever thought up....
• Reverend Lovejoy: Homer, this is really low. Home
  Not as low as my low, low prices! Mr. Plow...
• Asphalt: rectal trouble
• Marge: Well, leave it to good ol' Mary Bailey to finally step in and do something about that hideous genetic mutation.
  Homer: [snort] Mary Bailey. Well, if I was governor, I'd sure find better things to do with my time....
• Did you hear about the Newfie that Thought that asphalt was rectum trouble.
• Homer: Give me some quarters... I'm doing my laundry.
  Clerk: Yeah, right. [gives him the quarters] Home...
• Homer: Well, I really should discuss this with my wife.
  Salesman: [scoffs] Your wife? [cracks an imaginary whip] Home...
• Lisa: [sotto voce] Dad, do you notice anything strange?
  Homer: [sotto voce] Yeah, his hairdo looks so queer -- Bu...