Bart: Uh, say, are you guys crooks?
Tony: Bart, um, is it wrong to steal a loaf of bread to feed your
starving family?
Bart: No.
Tony: Well, suppose you got a large starving family. Is it wrong to
steal a truckload of bread to feed them?
Bart: Uh uh.
Tony: And, what if your family don't like bread? They like...
cigarettes?
Bart: I guess that's okay.
Tony: Now, what if instead of giving them away, you sold them at a price
that was practically giving them away. Would that be a crime,
Bart?
Bart: Hell, no!
Tony: Enjoy your gift.
-- What if he puts jelly on it? "Bart the Murderer"
