Homer: [expansive] So, how was everybody's day at school?
Bart: Horrifying!
Lisa: Pointless!
Marge: Exhausting. It took the children forty minutes to locate Canada
on the map.
Homer: Marge, anyone can miss Canada, all tucked away down there.
Lisa: Well, _my_ teacher's a nightmare. Three kids got sick from
inhaling his ointment fumes, he confiscated everything made of
tin, and then he sent us home early because he got his beard
caught in the pencil sharpener.
[at school, Abe tries to help Jasper get out of it]
[Abe turns the crank; Jasper gets pulled in a bit]
Abe: Oh! Oh, um, OK, um, hmm...um, here.
[turns it some more; Jasper gets pulled in more]
D'oh! OK, uh, OK, let's see, um...what if I did this?
[turns it some more; Jasper gets pulled in more]
Um...you're on your own. [runs off]
Lisa: There's no way I'll get into an ivy league school now. At this
rate I probably won't even get into Vassar.
Homer: I've had just about enough of your Vassar-bashing, young lady!
-- Homer, defender of the faith, "The PTA Disbands"
Bart: Horrifying!
Lisa: Pointless!
Marge: Exhausting. It took the children forty minutes to locate Canada
on the map.
Homer: Marge, anyone can miss Canada, all tucked away down there.
Lisa: Well, _my_ teacher's a nightmare. Three kids got sick from
inhaling his ointment fumes, he confiscated everything made of
tin, and then he sent us home early because he got his beard
caught in the pencil sharpener.
[at school, Abe tries to help Jasper get out of it]
[Abe turns the crank; Jasper gets pulled in a bit]
Abe: Oh! Oh, um, OK, um, hmm...um, here.
[turns it some more; Jasper gets pulled in more]
D'oh! OK, uh, OK, let's see, um...what if I did this?
[turns it some more; Jasper gets pulled in more]
Um...you're on your own. [runs off]
Lisa: There's no way I'll get into an ivy league school now. At this
rate I probably won't even get into Vassar.
Homer: I've had just about enough of your Vassar-bashing, young lady!
-- Homer, defender of the faith, "The PTA Disbands"
Related:
- Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness,
feel the slippery finish. Caresses it, experience it... - Homer: All right. The first thing they told me to do was to make sure
everyone here is in the right class.
[gets tobacco spat on him] Down the hall,... - Homer: I think Lisa needs another push on her new tire swing!
Lisa: No, Dad, I want to get down. This tire is filthy... - Faith: These are special VIP badges. They'll get you into places
other tourists never see.
Homer: Miss, what does the `I' stand for? Faith: Important... - Homer: Lisa, honey, are you going to be OK?
Lisa: Bleeding Gums was my hero and I never got to tell him how I felt.
Homer: Oh, I'm sure he knew, and I'm sure that wherever... - Ranger: I won't lie to you. Our chances of finding your children are
slim to nil.
Lisa: [from below] Hi mom! [Smithers and... - Homer: {[reads label on the Mr. Cleanser bottle]
Hmm.
"Use only in a well-ventilated area." Shove it, ... - Burns: Just sign here, and your son will stand to inherit my entire
estate.
Homer: Woo hoo! We're rich! Bart, get over to the... - Homer: Come on, Marge, let me in! There's crickets out here.
[Marge opens the door, glares] OK, Marge. Things...
From the same category:
- Lisa: How are the southwestern pizza fingers?
Moe:
They're, um...[reads] "awesomely outrageous". Marge... - Patty: This is a Mexican delicacy called a `taco platter'.
Selma: Mmm, delicious. -- Narrating a slide show... - Faith: These are special VIP badges. They'll get you into places
other tourists never see.
Homer: Miss, what does the `I' stand for? Faith: Important... - Thanks, Bart! We got the day off from school for this!
Milhouse attends Bart's wake, "Bart the... - Announcer: It's a tool that every home handyman needs!
It's a jigsaw! It's a power drill! It's a wood-turning...
