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• If you wanna complain about my attitude dial 1 (800) EAT-SH*T.
• Limit 1 per customer.
• Want to call Geraldo Rivera. He has an 800 number! Simply dial 1-800-TRASH-TV
• Want to speak with Fawn Hall or Ollie North? They have an 800 number! Simply dial 1-800-WE SHRED
• Brook's Laws of Retailing: Security isn't. Management can't.
  Sales promotions don't. Customer assistance doesn't. Worker's won't....
• We are sorry. We cannot complete your call as dialed.
  Please check the number and dial again or ask your operator for assistance. This is a recording....
• Greetings from Iam, Ok.
• IAM: Increase Amperage Above Maximum