Related:

• It's easy to drop a cucumber. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• Cucumbers stay hard for a week. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• Cucumbers can stay up all night, and you won't have to sleep in the wet spot.
  -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me...
• A cucumber won't ask, How was it? -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• Cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do.
  -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me...
• Cucumbers don't fall asleep on your chest or drool on the pillow.
  -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me...
• Cucumbers don't get TOO excited. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me
• Cucumbers don't play the guitar and try to find themselves.
  -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me...
• Cucumbers don't leave you wondering for a month. -- Reasons why cucumbers are better than me