Related:

• There is no such thing as inner peace; there is only nervousness or death.
  Any attempt to prove otherwise is a breach of manners. -- Fran Lebowitz...
• All God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.
  -- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life...
• If you are of the opinion that the contemplation of suicide is sufficient evidence of a poetic nature, do not forget that actions speak louder than words.
  -- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life...
• The three questions of greatest concern are -- 1. Is it attractive?
  2. Is it amusing? 3. Does it know its place? -- Fran Lebowitz, "Metropolitan Life...
• Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep. -- Fran Lebowitz
• Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep." -- Fran Lebowitz
• The only certain thing in life is death.
• Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.
  -- Fran Lebowitz...
• Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying. -- Fran Lebowitz