Related:

• A man goes into a bar and begins to tell a Polish joke.
  The man sitting next to him, a big hulking powerhouse, turns and says menacingly, "*I'm* Polish....
• A man rescured a genie from a bottle and was granted one wish as a reward.
  I want to be rock-hard and get plenty of ass for the rest of my life," the man said....
• An eighty-year-old woman is rocking away the afternoon on her porch when she sees an old, tarnished lamp sitting near the steps.
  She picks it up, rubs it gently, and lo and behold a genie appears!...
• I remember once being on a station platform in Cleveland at four in the morning.
  A black porter was carrying my bags, and as we were waiting for the train to come in, he said to me...
• Once upon a time, a four-year-old boy was visiting his uncle and aunt.
  He was a very outspoken little boy and ofttimes had to be censured to say the right thing at the right time....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Bart: Mr. Burns, I don't want to seem ungrateful, but I want to go home to my family.
  Burns: [sighs] I was hoping I wouldn't have to tell you this, but....
• One evening he spoke. Sitting at her feet, his face raised to her, he allowed his soul to be heard.
  My darling, anything you wish, anything I am, anything I can ever be....
• Marge: Homey, are you really going to ignore Grampa for the rest of your life.
  Homer: Of course not, Marge, just for the rest of his life....