Related:

• I bought a dog the other day... I named him Stay. It's fun to call him.
  .. "Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!" He went insane....
• I don't have to walk my dog anymore. I walked him all at once.
  He was fun when he was a puppy. I named him Stay....
• I bought a dog the other day. I named him Stay. It's fun to call him.
  'Come here, Stay! Come here, Stay!' He went insane. -- Steven Wrigh...
• I have a friend whose a billionaire. He invented Cliff's notes.
  When I asked him how he got such a great idea he said, "Well first I....
• Phoebe: Yeah, so I said, "OK, relax please," y'know
  I mean, sex can be just about two people right there in the moment, y'know, it's, if he wants to see me again he can call and if not, that's fine too....
• I have a box of telephone rings under my bed. Whenever I get lonely, I open it up a little bit, and I get a phone call.
  One day I dropped the box all over the floor. The phone wouldn't stop ringing....
• I have a friend who's a billionaire. He invented Cliff notes.
  When I asked him how he got such a great idea, he said, 'Well first I....
• Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: What does it matter?
  He can't come anyway. [I got a dog with no legs -- I call him Cigarette....
• Troy: [voiceover] When Krusty the clown got canceled, he tried everything to stay on the air.
  Here's what you didn't see. Krusty: Watch my show, I will send you this book featuring me in a variety of sexually explicit positions....