Related:

• Real programmers don't bring brown-bag lunches. If the vending machine doesn't sell it, they don't eat it.
  Vending machines don't sell quiche....
• Real programmers never eat at restaurants. If the vending machine sells it, they eat it.
  If it doesn't, they don't. Real programmers don't bring brown-bag lunches, either....
• Real programmers don't eat breakfast, lunch, or dinner.
  Real programmers eat whenever they want to, and only with food from vending machines....
• Real programmers do not eat quiche. They eat Twinkies (because they are in vending machines) and Szechuan food (because they deliver at 4am).
  Also, real programmers have recently discovered the product, JOLT Cola and have begun to stock this instead of Coke or Mountain Dew....
• There is a massive, broken vending machine here.
• Real Programmers don't eat quiche. They eat Twinkies and Szechwan food.
• I've seen condom vending machines, but this one installs.
• Above a condom vending machine: For refund insert baby.
• It takes someone with the intelligence of a vending machine to argue with one.