Related:

• If you get hungry in the middle of the night, there's a open beer in the fridge.
  -- Barney Gumbel, your gracious host, "Homer's Night Ou...
• In the future, you're going to get computers as prizes in breakfast cereals.
  You'll throw them out because your house will be littered with them. -- Robert Lucky...
• In the future, you're going to get computers as prizes in breakfast cereals.
  You'll throw them out because your house will be littered with them....
• Argue for your limitations and you get to keep them. -- Richard Bach
• You wouldn't want to meet the person of your dreams in a bar.
  'Cause when you get married and your little boy says, "Dad, what was it like when you first met Mom?...
• Tell all your friends to get swimming pools in case you want to visit.
  -- More things to do as preparation for life as a mermaid....
• Next time your in-laws (or other equally likeable sort) come to visit, remember thi
  The word visit appears in the Bible describing when the Lord sent the plagues to the Egyptians....
• Marge: Uh... sorry. Lovejoy: Thanks a lot, Marge. That was our only burlesque house.
  Belle: I _do_ love it when you drop by, Marge. Next time, why don't we get together at _your_ house....
• Progasm: the feeling you get when your code works the first time.