Related:

• Guru Saj: You must be Ross. Ross: Hi. Guru Saj: I am Guru Saj.
  (takes the drawer back and replaces) Ross: Listen, I got to tell you I_ve-I_ve never been to a guru before, so....
• Boy and girl in the bath. Girl: What is that long thing ?
  Boy : It`s mine. Girl: Can I play with it ? Boy : No! You`ve broken yours already....
• Bart: Hello, there, fellow Shelbyvillians. Martin2
  Wait a minute. If you're from Shelbyville, how come we've never seen you at school?...
• I 've wandered east, I 've wandered west, Through many a weary way
  But never, never can forget The love of life's young day....
• You wanna know what I think? I think you're some kinda deviated prevert!
  I think General Ripper found out about your preversions and that you were organizing some kind of mutiny of preverts!...
• I(ve) B(een) M(islead)
• Marge: Do you want your son to become become Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, or a sleazy male stripper?
  Homer: Can't he be both, like the late Earl Warren?...
• The challenge was to write a paragraph that read one way when punctuated one way, and read the complete opposite when punctuated another way.
  Dear President Clinton, Dear President Clinton, I would like to compliment you....
• Riker: "Deanna, I don't know if you can hear me, I've, I've heard doctors say that even when someone's in a coma, they may be able to hear when people talk to them.
  But it might help, to stimulate the brain...speed healing....