Related:

• Why should you bury your lawyer? Because deep down inside, he's a good guy.
• I met this girl very aggressively ... I just walked up to her and I said, "Who are you?
  I have to know who you are!" It's a good opener, but you can't sustain that level of excitement....
• AIDS, drugs, abortion - Don't Liberals just kill you?
• Is that a hard drive or are you just happy to see me?
• Reliable source, n: The guy you just met.
• I was in Tennessee and they hated me. They knew I came in from California.
  A guy stood up and said, "At least here in Tennessee we don't drive all over our freeways and shoot and kill people!...
• Jim, this is Matty down at Ralph's and Mark's. Some guy named Angel Martin just ran up a fifty buck bar tab, and now he wants to charge it to you.
  You gonna pay it?...
• Jim, this is Matty down at Ralph's and Mark's. Some guy named Angel Martin just ran up a fifty buck bar tab.
  And now he wants to charge it to you. You gonna pay it?...
• One time we were driving through a construction zone and the sign said, "Speed Limit 35 Ahead.
  And there were four of us. We were through there in no time. -- Guy Geechy...