Related:

• Jim, this is Matty down at Ralph's and Mark's. Some guy named Angel Martin just ran up a fifty buck bar tab.
  And now he wants to charge it to you. You gonna pay it?...
• Chloe: [seeing Ross enter] Hey, it's the dinosaur guy.
  [runs over to Ross] Hi, Ross. Ross: Oh, hi Chloe....
• Skinner: Mrs. Krabappel, Bart has something he wants to say to you.
  Bart: I won't say it! Skinner: Bart! Bart: Oh ....
• Ross: What, so this guy is helping you for no apparent reason?
  Rachel: Uh-huh! Ross: And he's, he's a total stranger?...
• You just can't go to a public swimming pool and splash around anymore.
  Everyone's swimming laps now. Some guy jumped in behind me and said, "How long are you gonna be using this lane, dude?...
• Now's the time to have some big ideas Now's the time to make some firm decisions We saw the Buddha in a bar down south Talking politics and nuclear fission We see him and he's all washed up -- Moving on into the body of a beetle Getting ready for a long long crawl He ain't nothing -- he ain't nothing at all.
  .. Death and Money make their point once more In the shape of Philosophical assassins Mark and Danny take the bus uptown Deadly angels for reality and passion Have the courage of the here and now Don't taking nothing from the half-baked buddhas When you think you got it paid in full You got nothing -- you got nothing at all....
• Barney: These fumes aren't as fun as beer. Sure, I'm all dizzy and nauseous, but where's the inflated sense of self-esteem?
  [a man at the end of the bar slumps to the floor] Moe...
• If you don't drink, when you wake up in the morning that's the best you're gonna feel all day.
  -- Martin Mull...
• The best advice I ever received was back in 1958 when I was playing the piano in a bar on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.
  C. A congressman came up to me and said, "Kid, stop singing `Stardust' and start singing about Congress....