Related:

• You have not made the best impression when the funeral director invites you to come to a wake, so that the feeling of grief may be augmented.
• When someone tells you something defies description, you can be pretty sure he's going to have a go at it anyway.
  -- Clyde B. Aste...
• You know that the day is not off to a good start when someone tells you that your unimportance is only matched by your truly great insignificance.
• You know it's going to be a bad day when: your only son tells you he wishes Anita Bryant would mind her own business.
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• You know you should be swimming when . . . Someone tells you they're having flounder for dinner and you ask when he'll be arriving.
• You made my head explode.
• When you try to make an impression, the chances are that that is the impression you will make.