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• You know I hooked up my modem to a board with no name...
• I saw what you did and I know who you are.
• If I don't know your name, how am I supposed to tell my diary about you?
• One day I got on the usual bus, and when I stepped in, I saw the most gorgeous blond Chinese girl.
  ..I sat beside her. I said, "Hi," and she said, "Hi," and then I said, "Nice day, isn't it?...
• What do you get if you cross a woodpecker with a chicken?
  I don't know, but you have to saw the eggs open....
• Woman: I've been waiting for you, Lisa. Lisa: [gasps] How did you know my name?
  Woman: Your nametag. ["Hi, I'm Lady Lisa"] Would you like to know your future?...
• Ross: [sarcastic] Oh please, can't I come to your special, magical cabin?
  Rachel: Why would you even want to come Ross? You're a horrible skier....
• Comic book guy: Question: is your name Ripley Scott or James Cameron?
  Homer: No, it's Homer. Comic book guy: Then I would thank you to stop peering at my screenplay, _Homer_....