Related:

• The sense of justice springs from self-respect; both are coeval with our birth.
  Children are born with an innate sense of justice...
• Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight. -- Phyllis Diller, "Phyllis Diller's Housekeeping Hi
• How many of me -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Three. One to change it, one to make up a joke about it, and one to spend the next 6 months going round telling it to everyone....
• Never go to bed mad - stay up and fight. -- Phyllis Dille
• Once you're safely in the mall, you should tie your children to you with ropes so the other shoppers won't try to buy them.
  Holiday shoppers have been whipped into a frenzy by months of holiday advertisements, and they will buy anything small enough to stuff into a shopping bag....
• Once you're safely in the mall, you should tie your children to you with ropes so the other shoppers won't try to buy them.
  Holiday shoppers have been whipped into a frenzy by months of holiday advertisements, and they will buy anything small enough to stuff into a shopping bag....
• Skinner: Edna! Krabappel: Seymour. Skinner: Mind if I sit down?
  Krabappel: It's a free country. Skinner: I, I don't follow you....
• Homer: All right. The first thing they told me to do was to make sure everyone here is in the right class.
  [gets tobacco spat on him] Down the hall, room twelve....