Related:

• If you drink like a fish, don't drive. Swim. -- Joe E. Lewi
• I always wake up at the crack of ice. -- Joe E. Lewi
• Well, the handwriting is on the floor. -- Joe E. Lewi
• I play in the low 80s. If it's any hotter than that, I won't play. -- Joe E. Lewi
• I distrust camels and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. -- Joe E. Lewi
• If a wife does not cause all your troubles, she at least conveniently symbolizes them at times.
  -- Don Herold...
• Don: I didn't know you had a cousin Penelope, Bill!
  Was she pretty? W. C.: Well, her face was so wrinkled it looked like seven miles of bad road....
• Don: I didn't know you had a cousin Penelope, Bill!
  Was she pretty? W. C.: Well, her face was so wrinkled it looked like seven miles of bad road....