Related:

• White's Chappaquidick Theorem: the sooner and in more detail you announce the bad news, the better.
• White's Chappaquidick Theorem The sooner and in more detail you announce bad news, the better.
• Professor: While you were gone the Trotters held a news conference to announce that I was a jive sucker.
• The sooner you fall behind, the more time you have to catch up.
• The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up!
• We are unable to announce the weather. We depend on weather reports from the airport, which is closed, due to weather.
  Whether we will be able to give you a weather report tomorrow will depend on the weather....
• Doctor, doctor, gimme the news. I've got a bad case of loving you.
• Have you heard the *bad* News? Cthulhu fhtagn! <-Huh?