Related:

• Saying guns cause crime is like saying matches cause arson.
• ACCOUNTANTS! Problems balancing the books? Got a few figures you want to get rid of?
  If *you've* got numbers that you'd like to disappear, why not call FASCIST ARSON SERVICES....
• Whenever I travel I like to keep the seat next to me empty.
  I found a great way to do it. When someone walks down the aisle and says to you, "Is someone sitting there?...
• In this world some people are going to like me and some are not.
  So, I may as well be me. Then I know if someone likes me, they like me....
• I just broke up with someone, and the last thing she said to me wa
  "You'll never find anybody like me again." And I'm thinking...
• Q: "Very impressive the way you contained that explosion.
  What else have you done?" Rogers: "I, I don't understand....
• Drawling granny voice:) Way back inna winner of fifty-two, we didn' have fanshy gadjets like no ansherin' machine.
  You jusht had to call and call until shummbody got home....
• chomp: vi. To {lose}; specifically, to chew on something of which more was bitten off than one can.
  Probably related to gnashing of teeth. See {bagbiter}....
• If someone told me it wasn't "fashionable" to talk about freedom, I think I'd just have to look him square in the eye and say, "Okay, YOU TELL ME what's `fashionable'.
  But he won't. And you know why? Because you can't ask someone what's fashionable in a smart-alecky way like that....