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• Never try to get your pecker sucked in France. -- Frank Zappa, lyrics to "Down in France
• Brown shoes Don't make it Quit School Why fake it Tee Vee dinner by the pool Watch your brother grow a beard .
• Go get a real estate license. -- Frank Zappa
• Call any vegetable, Call any vegetable, And the chances are good That the vegetable Will respond to you.
  -- Frank Zappa, Lyrics in "Absolutely Free...
• Everybody in this room is wearing a uniform, so don't kid yourself... -- Frank Zappa
• This is a message to all the cute people in the world.
  If you are cute, if you are even beautiful, liste...
• People are stupid. The world can go to hell. Let'stay home and watch TV.
• I have the thing you need, I am endowed beyond your wildest Clearasil-spattered fantasies, Oh!
  oh! oh! Oh Oh oh oh oh oh oh ohhhhhh! -- Frank Zappa, Fillmore East '71, lyrics to "Bwana Dik...
• And the northern lights commenced to glow. And she said, with a tear in her eye, "Watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow.
  -- Frank Zappa, "The Story of Nanook and the Fur Trappe...