Related:

• TARTAN Checked pattern that is far too loud, but permitted to be so because it's Scottish tradition.
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA...
• SAND Small grains of rock, which turn up everywhere for weeks after you've been to the beach.
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA...
• DICTIONARY A book, generally in alphabetical order, which lists the definitions of a number of words.
  It is often postulated that persons who are unfamiliar with the spellings of words should refer to dictionaries....
• SEMESTER A university half-year, especially designed so that the first ten or so weeks are piss-easy, followed by about four weeks of assignment/revision/exam absolute misery.
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA...
• just appalling" George Bush (USA) (bigboss@white-house.
  wash.gov) -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA....
• INCOMPETENCE A politer word for stupidity. If you are accused of incompetence, just remember, it is far better to be incompetent than incontinent (see below).
  -- Daniel Bowen's TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA...
• VANQUISH A word most commonly used in solemn ceremonies, usually of the form "Behold the devil, I now vanquish thee" in weird religious ceremonies or bad fantasy books.
  The amusing thing being that the speaker is generally of the mistaken belief that the use of a little Olde English will result in the demise of Satan for all eternity....
• VILLAGE Word now almost exclusively used in tourist brochures just after the adjectives "enchanting" and "traditional".
  And possibly "quaint". Generally descriptive of a small settlement with more churches than shops, which gets boring rapidly, despite being picturesque....
• NLQ (NEAR LETTER-QUALITY) Euphemism in the field of computer printers.
  When the salesman says "yes sir or madam, this printer here offers Near-Letter-Quality printing" they actually mean "what, you're too stingy to shell out on a laser printer?...