I was out on a date recently and the guy took me horseback riding. That was
kind of fun, until we ran out of quarters.
--Susie Loucks
I can remember her just as if it were yesterday ... Our first meeting. It
was in the park. She coyly dropped her handkerchief. And as I picked it up,
she was embarrassed. Her nose was still in it.
-- Jackie Gleason
kind of fun, until we ran out of quarters.
--Susie Loucks
I can remember her just as if it were yesterday ... Our first meeting. It
was in the park. She coyly dropped her handkerchief. And as I picked it up,
she was embarrassed. Her nose was still in it.
-- Jackie Gleason
Related:
- She was a very intelligent woman. I remember one time I thought she was
cheating on me, but I couldn't prove it.
So I followed her. She picked this guy up and they drove to a motel.... - I love those slow-talking Southern girls. I was out with a Southern girl
last night, took her so long to tell me she wasn't that kind of girl, she
was.
-- Woody Woodbury... - We're going to find out tonight who the oldest lady in the audience is.
And we have a marvelous present for her. When we find the oldest lady, we're going to give her .... - I was working on a case. It had to be a case, because I couldn't afford a
desk.
Then I saw her. This tall blond lady. She must have been tall because I was on the third floor.... - Joan, the rather well-proportioned secretary, spent almost all of
her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel.
She wore a bathing suit the first day, but on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan.... - The sky was dark, the moon was high
All alone just she and I
Her hair was sof
her eyes were blue I knew just what she wanted to do Her skin so soft, her legs so fine I ran my fingers down her spine I didn't know how but I tried my best I started by placing my hands on her breast I remember my fear, my fast beating heart But slowly she spread her legs apart And when I did it I felt no shame All at once - the white stuff came At last it's finished, it's all over now My first time ever at milking a cow.... - Gladys: To my sister Jackie, I leave my pet Iguana, Jub-Jub.
Jackie: Why didn't she just leave me the bowel obstruction that killed her? -- "Selma's Choice... - COONDOG MEMORY
(heard in Rutledge, Missouri, about eighteen years ago)
Now
his dog is for sale, and she can not only follow a trail twice as old as the average dog can, but she's got a pretty good memory to boot.... - My wife doesn't give me any trouble anymore. She died.
I had her cremated. I mixed in a little marijuana and smoked her....
