Related:

• Homer: Uh...I'm out. Carl: No, no no, Homer, you have the Royal, um.
  ..Sampler. [three six ten jack king] Home...
• I'm not paranoid, it's just that everyone else thinks I am. -- G Farbe
• I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life.
  The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want. -- Mark Twai...
• Homer: Shut up! Shut up! Stop it! Stop it. I can't take this any more.
  I can't let that brave man out there die alone. I'm surprised and disgusted by all of you -- especially his children....
• Homer: Dad, how come you never gave me any encouragement?
  Maybe I could have been something more than I am....
• I am determined that my children shall be brought up in their father's religion, if they can find out what it is.
  -- Charles Lamb...
• Grandma: A caller at this hour? [to Mr. VH] You dial 9-1, then when I say so, dial 1 again.
  [opens the door] [TM] Bart: [sees Milhouse, sighs with relief] Milhouse, please....
• I went into Gus's artificial organ and taco stand. I said "Give me a bladder por favor.
  The guy said "Is that to go?" I said, "Well what else would I want it for?" -- Emo Phillip...
• #define _DISCLAIMER_ "I am solely responsible for what I say.