Related:

• The guy who brags that he walked three miles to school probably has a grandchild that has to park that far away today.
• Nothing gives a used car more miles per gallon than a salesman. -- Boswell's Rule
• If the car industry behaved like the computer industry over the last 30 years, a Rolls-Royce would cost $
  5, get 300 miles per gallon, and blow up once a year killing all passengers inside....
• The more a cat runs over your car, the more pawprints it gets.
• A CONSULTANT - Any ordinary guy with a briefcase more than 50 miles from home.
  -- THE ALL-PURPOSE BUSINESSMAN'S VOCABULARY...
• Never argue with anyone who buys ink by the gallon.
• Loser: Guy who plays Monopoly and gets mugged on Boardwalk.
• At the University of Illinois they think they've developed a new source of fuel for energy.
  They think they can make fuel from horse manure. I ain't lyin'....
• One of the things not to say to a state trooper who has just pulled you over for doing more than the sign announcing the miles per hour allows is "Do you look like this all the time or are you simply constipated?
  It is nice to show concern, but this is not a good example of that kind of concern....