Related:

• In the Plaza Hotel once, when I was doing the quiz show, there was a priest in the elevator.
  I hope you're not offended by this--I'd tell a story about a rabbi but it doesn't fit, and neither did the rabbi and they finally threw him out of the synagogue....
• Skinner: Bart Simpson on the side of law and order?
  Has the world gone topsy-turvey? Bart: That's right, man....
• I have reached an age when I look just as good standing on my head as I do right side up.
  -- Frank Sulliva...
• I can't say I've ever been lost, but I was bewildered once for three days.
  -- Daniel Boone (1734-1820), attributed...
• Bart: [shudders] I hate this place. Lisa: Yeah. It seems like our house, but everything's got a creepy Pat Boone-ish quality to it.
  Ned: Hey, kids! Nachos, Flanders style -- that's cucumbers with cottage cheese....
• I shook my family tree and a bunch of nuts fell out.
• The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, "Where the F!
  CK is my ROOF ?!?" -- Pat Calitri...
• There are three sides to every argument: your side, my side and the right side.
• double bucky adj. Using both the CTRL and META keys.
  The command to burn all LEDs is double bucky F....