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• I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right. When I put on my shirt the button fell off, when I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off, I tell ya, I was afraid to go to the bathroom.
  -- Rodney Dangerfield...
• I used to have a handle on life, then DOS closed it...
• I used to have a handle on life, then it broke.
• I still don't have a handle on life, but I have its FCB.
• FELL OFF OF THE CLIFF by Eileen Dove
• Days of my life I'd like to forget: The day the doctors told me I was sick.
  The day I had to tell my friends I was ill. The day my hair fell out....
• What can I say? I laughed. I cried. I fell down. It changed my life. The end.
• I do owe many thanks to Lester and Eliza. This is a great vindication for anybody who has ever taken a bath, went to get the paper, fell down, and the door slam behind them and the doorknow break off.
  -- A day in the life of Apu, "The Day the Violence Died...
• I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel.
  -- Excerpt from insurance form....