Related:

• Monica: Please tell me you_re stopping now. Pete: I_m fine!
  I'd fight tonight, if they_d let me. [stands up and starts swinging his arms] See this circle I'm marking off here?...
• Burns: Meltdown alert? Mad dog drill? Blimp attack?
  Ah... I think a good old-fashioned fire drill today....
• Homer: Welcome to the Simpson residence or "casa de Simpson," as I call it.
  Grimes: Yeah, what did you want to see me about, Simpson?...
• They sent for me to come down to Washington in an airplane .
  .. Sure enough, no sooner I got on the plane they strapped me down....
• Homer: I'm telling you Marge, this will work. They'll think I'm Krusty and give us free stuff.
  I've been getting free stuff all day! Look at this swell bucket of house paint....
• Joey: All right. [gets up] Monica: [stopping him] No!
  Joey, we swore we'd never tell! Chandler: [running over and joining Monica] They'll never understand!...
• Three fellas up in heaven. St. Peter's interviewing them.
  He says to the first guy, "How did you get up here in heaven?...
• Moe: You are absolutely, positively, the dumbest haunted love tester that I have ever met!
  [pounds on Grampa] Betty: [walks in] What is going on in here?...
• Bart: Hey, how come Lisa gets a pony? Homer: Because she stopped loving me.
  Bart: I don't love you either, so give me a moped....