Related:

• The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys.
  I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while....
• I am against all hobbies. I have been against ever since I figured out that nothing I ever do is considered a hobby.
  All my life I have had to fill out forms that ask about hobbies....
• One day, when I came home from work, I accidently put my car key in the door of my apartment building.
  .. I turned it... and the whole building started up....
• My boy is mean kid. I came home the other day and saw him taping worms to the sidewalk, he sits there and watches the birds get hernias.
  Well, only last Christmas I gave him a B-B gun and he gave me a sweatshirt with a bulls-eye on the back....
• I sent a letter to the fish, I told them, "This is what I wish.
  The little fishes of the sea, They sent an answer back to me....
• I sent a letter to the fish, I told them, This is what I wish.
  The little fishes of the sea, They sent an answer back to me....
• Barlow: [on the radio] My friends, Bob is a political prisoner.
  I want every loyal listener to do everything they can to get him out of jail....