Related:

• Skinner: Mother doesn't approve of me dating so I need you to keep her busy for a few hours while Edna and I sneak out.
  [sneaks out] Bart: Oh, I can't take much more of this....
• What about these commandments then?" "You again? All right.
  .. There shall be TWO commandments, and this shall be the first of them...
• There is little more frustrating that having a dollar bill machine return your dollar bill
  just after you finish the wash phase at the car wash and find that you now need money to get to the rinse phase....
• QUEUE Something that supermarket supervisors obviously have no idea how to manage.
  It's tempting when you're waiting to grab a PA microphone and shout "Yes, shoppers, don't leave yet, 'cos we've got mega bargains now!...
• Grimes: Oh, I, I can't stand it any longer. This whole plant is insane.
  Insane, I tell you! [snaps mentally] Daahh! Aaah!...
• One day President Reagan, Chairman Andropov, the Pope, and a boy scout were flying together in an airplane.
  Right out in the middle of nowhere the plane developed engine trouble and started to go down....
• One day President Reagan, Chairman Brezhnev, the Pope, and a boy scout were flying together in an airplane.
  Right out in the middle of nowhere the plane developed engine trouble and started to go down....
• You cannot keep a fully grown chimpanzee in the house.
  If he decides to throw himself at you out of affection he can easily knock you down the stairs....
• The bank called to tell me that I'm overdrawn, Some freaks are burning crosses out on my front lawn, And I *can't*believe* it, all the Cheetos are gone, It's just ONE OF THOSE DAYS!
  -- Weird Al Yankovic, "One of Those Day...