Related:

• I have yet to meet a C compiler that is more friendly and easier to use than eating soup with a knife.
  -- ...understanding Programming Language...
• Don't dig your grave with your own knife and fork. English Proverb
• Now Sally, don't you know you are not supposed to eat with your knife?
  "Yes, Mother, but my fork leaks....
• FORK, n. An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.
  Formerly the knife was employed for this purpose, and by many worthy persons is still thought to have many advantages over the other tool, which, however, they do not altogether reject, but use to assist in charging the knife....
• Story! God bless you! I have none to tell, sir.
  -- George Canning (1770-1827) -- The Friend of Humanity and the Knife-Grinde...
• I have bad luck with plants. I bought me a philodendron .
  .. and I put it in the kitchen and it drank my soup. -- Joan Rive...
• Chairman: Dr. Nick, this malpractice committee has received a few complaints against you.
  [reads from clipboard] Of the 160 gravest charges, the most troubling are performing major operations with a knife and fork from a seafood restaurant....
• I'll have the Turtle Soup....and make it snappy!
• Bart: [hurt] Hey, Mom, you didn't wake me up. Marge
  Here's your hot chocolate. Bart: [looking at other cups] You didn't put my marshmallow in....