Related:

• If it doesn't have recursive function calls, Real Software Engineers don't program in it.
• Real software engineers don't program in assembler. They become queasy at the very thought.
• Real software engineers don't comment their code. The identifiers are so mnemonic they don't have to.
• Real software engineers don't write in ADA, because the standards bodies have not quite decided on a formal spec yet.
• Real software engineers like C's structured constructs, but they are suspicious of it because they have heard that it lets you get "close to the machine.
• Real software engineers admire PASCAL for its discipline and Spartan purity, but they find it difficult to actually program in.
  They don't tell this to their friends, because they are afraid it means that they are somehow Unworthy....
• Real software engineers write in languages that have not actually been implemented for any machine, and for which only the formal spec (in BNF) is available.
  This keeps them from having to take any machine dependencies into account....
• Real software engineers aren't too happy about the existence of users, either.
  Users always seem to have the wrong idea about what the implementation and verification of algorithms is all about....
• Real software engineers don't read dumps. They never generate them, and on the rare occasions that they come across them, they are vaguely amused.