Related:

• Whenever I use Elvis stamps, I have my hound dog lick them.
• Only a few industrious Scots perhaps, who indeed are dispersed over the face of the whole earth.
  But as for them, there are no greater friends to Englishmen and England, when they are out on 't, in the world, than they are....
• People want to know why I do this, why I write such gross stuff.
  I like to tell them I have the heart of a small boy -- and I keep it in a jar on my desk....
• I do my best to be just who I am, but everybody wants me to be just like them.
• I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends.
  ..that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop telling the truth about them....
• Timothy: "Can we still do things together? Even if I'm not really an android?
  Data: "I have many human friends. I would be pleased to count you among them....
• Never lend books, for no one ever returns them; the only books I have in my library are books that other folks have lent to me.
  -- Anatole France...
• When I was growing up, all my friends wanted to have sex with anything that moved.
  Why limit yourself?" I told them. -- Emo Philip...
• Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? -- Abraham Lincol