Related:

• I know a little bit about handicapping. If the horse has an IV, you want to stay away from it.
  -- Paula Poundstone...
• I have short-term memory loss, though I like to think of it as Presidential eligibility.
  -- Paula Poundstone...
• When my mom got really mad, she would say, "Your butt is my meat.
  Not a particularly attractive phrase. And I always wondered, "Now, what wine goes with that?...
• Homer: This is my quest. I'm like that guy. That Spanish guy.
  You know, he fought the windmill... Marge: Don Quixote?...
• Which I have earned with the sweat of my brows. -- Miguel de Cervantes (1547-1616) -- Don Quixote, Part i, Book i, Chap.
  iv...
• 8) "My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat.
  I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim." --Paula Poundstone...
• Sancho Panza by name, is my own self, if I was not changed in my cradle.
  -- Miguel de Cervantes (1547-1616) -- Don Quixote, Part ii, Book iii, Chap. xxx...
• I hate skinny women, especially when they say things like "Sometimes I forget to eat.
  Now, I've forgotten my mother's maiden name, and my keys, but you've got to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat!...