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• Never mind the star - get those damn camels off the lawn!
• Never mind the star, get those da** camels off the lawn!
• Things Only A Mom Can Teach You: ** My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
  .. "Just wait until your father gets home." ** My Mother taught me about RECEIVING....
• A young sub-altern was posted to a British army detachment in the desert.
  On his tour of the facility with the master sergent, he noticed a group of camels....
• I Like 'em Dead I was just 13 when my mommy caught me French-kissing a cadaver in my bed.
  She said, "Son, how could you do this?" And I said "Mom, I like 'em dead....
• She (to passing man): Excuse me, do you have the time?
  He: Do you have the energy? What is your favorite position on extramarital sex?...
• Is this yours? Your dog left it on my lawn...
• When do I get my vacation? never.