Related:

• ALIEN ZOMBIE & THE CONGO LIZARDS You’re in luck. As my luck would have it, I made my bones in a musical family.
  Grandpop slapped ivories at the Congo, and Daddy-O moonlit his rocket ‘88 in the lizard lounges....
• REASONS TO HATE COMPUTERS They cost too much. They break down all the time.
  They're too hard to fix. All the different brands are incompatible....
• This was posted a week ago in talk.pol.misc, but thought I'd let you mull it over.
  It is original writing, and is typical of my callous mode of social thought which I occasionally fall into....
• Statistics shows that most people are abnormal!" "How that?
  "According to statistics, a normal person has one breast and one testicle......
• A loandlord has a homosexual couple and a lesbian couple living in his building.
  He decides to evict them. Who moves out first and why?...
• A mathematician gives a talk intended for a general audience.
  The talk is announced in the local newspaper, but he expects few people to show up because nobody who is not a mathematician will be able to make any sense of the title...
• Most people are apathetic, but I don't care.
• Ever since I was a young boy, Megabogue I've sprayed phones in the mall.
  Brick Wall Painter" From Footscray to Beaumaris Pommy I must have sprayed them all....
• This is the Fertilizer Club. It will not cost you a cent to join.
  Upon receipt of this letter, go to the address at the top of this list and shit in their garden....