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• THE TWELVE DAYS OF CHRISTMAS On the first day of Christmas, my kitten ruined for me.
  ....... A batch of my special hand-print cookies....
• The only thing sure about the baseball season: It'll end too soon--weeks before the presidential campaign is over.
• There are three children in the Ferraro-Zaccaro family
  Donna, John and Laura. You have to feel good about a country in which kids can aspire to follow in their mother's footsteps....
• ROMAN CATHOLICS Two leprechauns went up to a convent and knocked on the door.
  When the sister answered, one of the leprechauns said, "Sister, do you have any leprechaun nuns here?...
• Why Is A Christmas Tree Better Than A Man 1. A Christmas tree is always erect.
  2. Even small ones give satisfaction. 3. A Christmas tree stays up for 12 days and nights....
• News of the Weird Lead Story Paul LaSalle, twenty-six, was killed near Mt.
  Pleasant, N.Y., in March. He lost control of his car when he pulled alongside a driver and began to berate him for having just cut LaSalle off....
• A NEW YEAR’S ADAM ON CHRISTMAS EVE, BUD Beginnings end.
  ..and endings begin. That’s either a Biblical paraphrase or a Microsoft credo....
• Mr. Reagan says there's a "new patriotism" in the country.
  Yeah, it's hard not to be proud of a country $1.5 trillion in debt and still on its feet....
• I think Santa Claus is a woman.... I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he's a she.
  Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull it all off!...