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• How Smart Are You? ------------------ 20 Correct - Genius 17 Correct - Above Normal 15 Correct - Normal 8 Correct - Nincompoop 6 Correct - Moron 3 Correct - Idiot QUESTIONS 1.
  Do they have a 4th of July in England? 2. How many birthdays does the average man have?...
• The Idiot Test 1. Do they have a 4th of July in England?
  2. How many birthdays does the average man have? 3....
• How many Reaganists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Ten. One to deny that the bulb is burned out, one to clarify the denial "The bulb is really just dim", one to blame the bulb burning out on the Carter-Mondale administration, one to blame the bulb burning out on the Congress, one to ask for a constitutional amendment that will prohibit bulbs burning out, one to replace the bulb with a kerosene lamp, one to borrow money from the Japanese to pay for the kerosene, one former Reaganist to lobby his old colleagues for a special favor for the kerosene importer, one to cash the check for investing in the kerosene importer, one to send the bill to the next generation....
• Proof By Intimidation ----- -- ------------ A Horse has an infinite number of legs.
  A horse has two legs in back and forelegs in front....
• How to Change OIl: Women: 1. Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since the last oil change.
  2. Drink a cup of coffee. 3. 15 minutes later, write a check and leave with a properly maintained vehicle....
• Things You Would Never Know Without The Movies ** During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.
  ** When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other....
• A tribe of Native Americans generally referred to their woman by the animal hide with which they made their blanket.
  Thus, one woman might be known as Squaw of Buffalo Hide, while another might be known as Squaw of Deer Hide....
• For all those Tool-Time enthusiasts..... HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of wa
  he hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate expensive car parts not far from the object we are trying to hit....
• Two guys wandered into a bar. One of the men shouted to the barkeeper,"Hiya, Mike.
  Set 'em up for me and my pal here." Then he turned to his slightly dim partner and boasted, "This is a great bar....