Related:

• The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages "Hi!
  I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am....
• One voice: I didn't expect an answering machine. Another voice
  Nobody expects an answrering machine. Our chief use is to get your name....
• Theme from "Indiana Jones" in the background.] You've reached the residence of John and Tom.
  We can't come to the phone right now, because we're cleaning the refrigerator....
• My answering machine reads, with spooky music in the background, or Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D minor, "Hello.
  You have reached xxx-xxxx,otherwise known as the epicenter of the universe....
• A friend was at a mutal friend's sister's house, and when she went out for beer, he changed her answering machine message.
  In a loud, deep, gravely, horror-film voice he recorded, "HI, THIS IS KATHY, I'M NOT MYSELF RIGHT NOW....
• Voice Mail My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
  A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here....
• Loud heavy-metal music in background; raspy voice:) Hello, this is the executioner.
  Joe can't come to the phone right now because he's DEAD!...
• Answering machines. Nowadays almost everyone has one, complete with a snappymessage of their own device.
  Wait for the beep and then read on. This is a short adaptation of Simon Butler-White's and Clive Archer's "could-be" phone messages released in Australian Cleo, August 1989....
• with a kazoo band playing "Thus Spake Zarathustra" in the background.
  ..] "Thinking you were making an ordinary phone call, you have instead reached....