Related:

• Q: Hear about the guy who complained to a friend that his wife had cut him down to twice a week.
  A: The friend said, "Hell that's not so bad, I know two guys she's cut out entirely!...
• THE DARWIN AWARDS Date: December,1997 The Darwin Award is made each year to the person who has managed to kill themselves (and therefore prevent the survival of their genes - hence Darwin!
  ) in the most bizarre way imaginable. Previous winners have included the man killed when the vending machine he was trying to extract a can of Coke from fell on him, and last years aviator who strapped a JATO module (rocket) to his car and lit the blue touchpaper....
• The ark lands after The Flood. Noah lets all the animals out.
  Says, "Go and multiply." Several months pass. Noah decides to check up on the animals....
• ObJoke: This guy goes to Texas on vacation. (No, that's not the punchline.
  ) When he's ready to leave the airport, he hails a cab, but a stretch limo pulls up....
• THE LATEST AND GREATEST AS COMPILED ON 18th October 1991
  The Complete Set Of Blonde Jokes (167) -------------------------------------- Revision 3....
• What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!
  Two plastic surgeons are talking about their recent operations, and one mentions that he grafted tits onto a sailor's back sometime ago....
• A Letter from your mama... Dear Son: I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast.
  We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so we moved....
• A bald guy was talking to a friend. He said his wife had been kidding him that his bald head felt just like her ass.
  The friend reached out and rubbed his head, nodded wisely and said, "You know, she's right!...
• Straight Out Of The Eighties... This will only make sense to those of us who had the dubious distinction of being children of the eighties, or listened to music on a regular basis.
  If you were "there", then you will understand.... I was working part time in a five and dime....