Related:

• There was a man from Nantucket Whose cock was so long he could suck it He said with a grin As he wiped off his chin If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it!
• Redneck Birth Control After having their 11th child, an Arkansas couple decided that enough was enough (they couldn't afford a double wide).
  So, the husband went to his doctor (who also treated mules) and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn't want to have any more children....
• Alabamian After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough (they could not afford a larger double-wide).
  So, the husband went to his doctor (who also treated mules) and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn't want to have any more children....
• From The Wit of Steven Wright: ** Last night I played a blank tape at full blast.
  The mime next door went nuts. ** If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?...
• 129 There was once a mechanic named Bench Whose best tool was a sturdy gut-wrench.
  With this vibrant device He could reach, in a trice, The innermost parts of a wench....
• Unknown Once upon a time there lived a man who had a maddening passion for baked beans.
  He loved 'em, but always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction....
• A Frenchman, an Englishman, a Texan, and a Mexican are flying in a plane.
  The pilot explains to her passengers that the plane is too heavy and in order to avoid an ugly crash, some weight needs to be removed from the plane....
• GOD will save me The police were going door to door warning everyone to evacuate because the river was rising.
  One door they came to, the man said "GOD will save me"....