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• Unknown Once upon a time there lived a man who had a maddening passion for baked beans.
  He loved 'em, but always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction....
• Pass the beans please!! Once upon a time there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans.
  She loved them but unfortunately they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her....
• The lady sipped her champagne, but when the gentleman went to sip his champagne the little man on his shoulder jumped on the bar, grabbed the glass, and threw the champagne in the gentleman's face.
  The bartender saw this and thought it was very strange....
• Benny, a first grader, was walking home from school when he saw a blinding flash of light and a puff of smoke
  in front of him stood his Fairy Godmother. She said, "I've come to grant you one wish and one wish only, what will it be?...
• I will not get very far with this attitude.
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• 153 There was a young girl of Detroit Who at fucking was very adroi
  She could squeeze her vagina To a pin-point, or finer, Or open it out like a quoit....
• An elderly woman walked into the main branch of the Chase Manhatten Bank holding a large paper bag in her hand.
  She told the young man at the window that she wished to take the $...
• When I was taking a 300 level computer science class in college there was a girl in the class that was a good friend of mine
  he was one of those people that was accademiclly briliant with zero common scence....