Recently the 2000 candidates were asked the age old question:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
VICE PRESIDENT GORE:
-- I fought for the chickens and I am fighting for the chickens right now. I
will not give up on the chickens crossing the road! I will fight for the
chickens and I will not disappoint them. Oh yea, and I created the road...
GOVERNOR GEORGE W. BUSH:
-- I don't believe we need to get the chickens across the road. I say give
the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs to let go
of controlling every movement of the chickens so they can get across the
road on their own.
SENATOR LIEBERMAN:
-- I believe that every chicken has the right to worship his or her God in
his or her own way. Crossing the road is a spiritual journey and no chicken
should be denied the right to cross the road in his or her own way.
SECRETARY CHENEY:
-- Chickens are big-time because they have wings. They could fly if they
wanted to. Chickens don't want to cross the road. They don't need help
crossing the road. In fact, I'm not interested in crossing the road myself.
RALPH NADER:
-- Chickens are misled into believing there is a road by the evil tire
makers. Chickens aren't ignorant, but our society pays tire makers to create
the need for these roads and then lures chickens into believing there is an
advantage to crossing them. Down with the roads, up with chickens.
PAT BUCHANAN:
-- To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
VICE PRESIDENT GORE:
-- I fought for the chickens and I am fighting for the chickens right now. I
will not give up on the chickens crossing the road! I will fight for the
chickens and I will not disappoint them. Oh yea, and I created the road...
GOVERNOR GEORGE W. BUSH:
-- I don't believe we need to get the chickens across the road. I say give
the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs to let go
of controlling every movement of the chickens so they can get across the
road on their own.
SENATOR LIEBERMAN:
-- I believe that every chicken has the right to worship his or her God in
his or her own way. Crossing the road is a spiritual journey and no chicken
should be denied the right to cross the road in his or her own way.
SECRETARY CHENEY:
-- Chickens are big-time because they have wings. They could fly if they
wanted to. Chickens don't want to cross the road. They don't need help
crossing the road. In fact, I'm not interested in crossing the road myself.
RALPH NADER:
-- Chickens are misled into believing there is a road by the evil tire
makers. Chickens aren't ignorant, but our society pays tire makers to create
the need for these roads and then lures chickens into believing there is an
advantage to crossing them. Down with the roads, up with chickens.
PAT BUCHANAN:
-- To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
Related:
- QUESTION: WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD ?
ANSWERS:
Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working... - Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A:
Chickens weren't invented yet... - You Chicken
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To show the armadillo/raccoon that it was possible... - Slow Down...
A farmer lived on a quiet rural highway.
But, as time went by, the traffic slowly built up at... - The Baby Chicken Asks:
Are I People?
No You Are Chicken!
Do Chickens Come From People? No, Chickens Come From... - How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in-
Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt... - Here are my categories, with examples (his):
ENGLISH:
I had some eyeglasses. I was walking down the street... - One Liners
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.... - 100 Ways to Confuse Your Roommate
1. Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate
eats meat.
Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie...
From the same category:
- Mothers Always Know...
John invited his mother over for dinner.
During the meal, his mother couldn't help noticing... - Here's one people can tell to their grandmothers:
Once upon a time there was a famous sea captain.
This captain was very successful at what he did;... - Various Nights Before Christmas...
A Microsoft Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas,
when all through the house Not a creature was stirring... - MS Windows and the Borg
Picard: Mr. LaForge, have you had any success with your attempts at finding
a weakness in the Borg?
And Mr. Data, have you been able to access their command... - Murphy's laws of combat operations...
** Friendly fire -
isn't. ** Recoilless rifles - aren't. ** If it's stupid...
