Note: If answer to last question begins with "T" or "A",

*Note: If answer to last question begins with "T" or "A", discontinue and
leave premises - keeping your head low and running in a serpentine fashion
is advised*
What do you want to be IF you grow up?
I swear that all the above information is correct to the best of my
knowledge under penalty of death, bodily harm, dismemberment, torture or
mental abuse.
Signature of applicant _________________________________
Signature of father _____________________________________
Signature of mother ____________________________________
Signature of priest/rabbi ___________________________________
Signature of State Representative _________________________
Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual.
Please allow 4-6 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if
approved. If denied, please never apply again. Don't call me, I'll call you.