Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is
to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them." Tired of his boasting,
his boss called his bluff, "OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it." So Bubba and his
boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough,
Tom Cruise, shouts, "Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right
in and join me for lunch!" Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still
skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks
Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky. "No, no, just name anyone else,"
"President Clinton, "his boss quickly retorts.
"Yes," Bubba says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington." And off they
go. At the White House, Clinton spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and
his boss over, saying, "Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a
meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee
first and catch up." Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not
After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba,
who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The Pope," his boss replies.
"Sure!" says Bubba. "My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a
long time." So off they fly to Rome. Bubba and his boss are assembled with
the masses in Vatican Square when Bubba says, "This will never work I can't
catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the
guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the
Pope." And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure
enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony. But
by the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and
is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks
him, "What happened?" His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until
you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said,
"Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?"
W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l <
-if you have to ask get out of the way-
Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was
writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that
he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the
window, and smash your face into the front fender?...