English Can Be A Silly Language
Lets face it, English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in eggplant.
No ham in hamburger.
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England French fries were not invented
in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone
beeth?
If the teacher taught, why didn't the preacher praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play, yet play at a recital?
Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day and cold as hell on
another?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house can burn
up as It burns down,
and in which you fill in a form by filling it out.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the
creativity of the human race (which isn't a race at all).
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
That is why "gachupines are silly T.V. viewers" ...
Lets face it, English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in eggplant.
No ham in hamburger.
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England French fries were not invented
in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone
beeth?
If the teacher taught, why didn't the preacher praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play, yet play at a recital?
Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
How can the weather be as hot as hell on one day and cold as hell on
another?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language where a house can burn
up as It burns down,
and in which you fill in a form by filling it out.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the
creativity of the human race (which isn't a race at all).
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
That is why "gachupines are silly T.V. viewers" ...
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