What are you doing?!? The message is over,GO AWAY!
What can you do for me?
What care I how time advances: I am drinking ale today.
What color is a chameleon on a mirror?
What could possibly go wrong.
What do batteries run on?
What do you mean that 2 years have passed??
What do you think?
What does Santa do at a house with no chimney?
What does ignorant mean?
What does this red button do?
What else can you do at 3:00 am?
What garlic is to salad, insanity is to art.
What goes around usually gets dizzy and falls over.
What goes up has probably been doused with petrol.
What has four legs and an arm? A happy pitbull.
What's Irish and stays out all night? Pati O'furniture.
What's another word for 'thesaurus?'
What's brown and sticky? A stick!
When in doubt, think.
When shooting a mime, do you use a silencer?
When their numbers dwindled from 50 to 8, the dwarfs
began to suspect "Hungry"
When you do a good deed get a receipt (in case heaven is like the IRS).
When you see a snake, never mind where he came from.
When you're in love, you're at the mercy of a stranger.
When your opponent is down, kick him.
Where does weight go when you lose it?
Where in the world is Carmen San Diego?
Who cares how it plays in Peoria?
Who cares who's on board?
Who glued the cup to the table?
Who is "they" anyway?
Whoever has the most when he dies... WINS!
Whoever has the most when he dies... IS DEAD!
Whoops, stepped on a frog.
Whosoever diggeth a pit shall falleth therein.
Why am I asking all these things?
Why are Chinese fortune cookies written in English?
Why are you looking down here? The joke is above!
Why are you wasting time reading taglines?
Why aren't there many Hannukah specials on tv?
Why be a man when you can be a success?
Why can't we just spell it orderves?
Why did the Albanion working class revolt?
Why did you read this?
Why do people cry when they're sad?
Why do they tell us to watch "The Today Show" tomorrow?
Why do we elect people and then become afraid of them?
Why do we read left to right yet turn pages right to left?
Why do you think they call it "find"?
Why does it matter if we all put our pants on one leg at a time?
Why does the beginning of your sentence end up in the middle of mine?
Why don't ease, lease, and please sound alike?
Why don't tomb, comb, and bomb sound alike?
Why get even, when you can get odd?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why isn't "palindrome" spelled "palindromeemordnilap"?
How come there's only one Monopolies Commission?
How come wrong numbers are never busy?
How do I set my laser printer for stun?
How do you get holy water?... Boil the hell out of it!
How do you know it's summer in Seattle? Rain's warm!
How do you make Windows faster ? Throw it harder
How do you write zero in Roman numerals?
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalog!
How does one expect the unexpected?
How long is a short story?
How long will a floating point operation float?
How many consultants will fit onto the head of a pin?
How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand!
How many weeks are there in a light year?
How much can I get away with and still go to heaven?
How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
This life is a test. It is only a test. Had this been an actual life,
you would have received further instructions as to what to do and where